Knocking Boots and Knitting Booties: Oops, I Did it Again! Pregnant, Take 2

Knocking Boots and Knitting Booties is a no-holds-barred series about sex during pregnancy from MsBehaved contributor Brighid. Last time, Brighid succeeded in conceiving, only to experience an inconveniently-timed miscarriage during a 5k race.  Read on…

Fortunately for us, we were able to get pregnant again in our next cycle and I currently have a due date of late November, 2012. Ironically, we found out we were pregnant the same weekend we set aside for our first foray into vaginal fisting. I’m a long-time friend of Ms Behaved editor Bianca James, and had recently come across a how-to column titled “Fisting 101” that she had published at the Eden Café website. I’d been curious about fisting for a long time and armed with her advice, MVP* and I had a Saturday night date. On a whim, I decided to take a pregnancy test on Friday afternoon (a few days earlier than I should have). You see, one of the things that “they” (doctors, the interwebs, maybe your mom if you and she have that sort of relationship) tell you is that early in your pregnancy, over stimulation of the cervix is bad. It can cause contractions (so can orgasm), irritation that leads to bleeding, and a whole lot of other stuff you don’t want to mess with. So in the interest of a pre-fisting health check, I figured I’d check my gestational status. Well, I was pregnant, so fisting is now postponed until the third trimester (when we hope to use it as a method for preparing for birth as well as for pleasure).

My first trimester was relatively easy, especially the first 6 weeks. My DD breasts grew a cup size and a half, seemingly overnight. (The only drawback to my awesome porn star breasts is that they hurt like hell). I felt tired, but not too bad. I had some nausea from 4-7pm, but nothing intolerable and no throwing up. I did develop an aversion to Indian cuisine, a former staple of our diet, and stewed tomatoes, but nothing too serious. Best of all, I didn’t get the libido crash that most women describe. Several years ago when I was on the pill I had experienced a total libido wipe out. Because the pill mimics the first trimester, I fully anticipated a similar reaction. Luckily things were proceeding basically as normal.

Until week 8, that is.

At this time, my gastrointestinal (GI) tract ground to a halt like Friday rush hour on LA’s 405 freeway. Now, for the past couple of years I’ve turned into the fiber queen. Fiber is good for digestion, colon health, and I just feel better when I’m eating a lot of high fiber foods, fruits, and veg. Plus, it’s fantastic for keeping everything clean and loose for anal play. All of a sudden I was eating upwards of 40 grams of fiber and drinking 3L of water a day. I ate prunes until they came out my ears, but to no avail. The only cure? Hitting mile 4.5 on a 7+ mile run. Effective, but it’s a pain to find a long running route with bathrooms, and not exactly a sustainable daily cure. In the 10 weeks that have passed I’ve gotten a handle on things, mainly through daily coffee, exercise, water, and figuring out that my calcium supplements were the primary culprits. Once I ditched the calcium pills, everything started to move smoothly again.

But, in all honesty, it’s made me as nervous about engaging in anal play. Anal play isn’t a staple of our sex life but it’s a nice thing to throw in from time to time just to keep things interesting. I honestly didn’t think I’d miss it so much until it was off the menu. What hit hard was the double combination of the psychological concerns (“am I clean?”) combined with the physical ones (“I’m really uncomfortable right now and have been for 3 days…”). As things are now, we haven’t tried to get back into it although the desire on my part is returning.

*MVP – After several weeks I finally came up with an acronym for my partner. It’s part reference to his athletic side- he’s been voted Most Valuable Player on his astronomy softball team – and part reference to my cheesy side: Most Valuable Partner. See folks, this is what happens when I’ve been entirely sober for 18 weeks.

Next time: Second Trimester Horniness, or My Fingers Won’t Behave!

Read more Knocking Boots and Knitting Booties here!


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